Saturday, July 21, 2012

Don't Sweat It!

One of the worst things in the whole world is playing basketball against a really sweaty guy who insists on taking his shirt off. Sweaty guys are bad just by themselves, but when you are forced to guard them on the basketball court, and your hands and arms get covered in their gross sweat, it's about enough to give a guy an epic case of the screaming willies. I used to know a guy who would start sweating heavily as soon as he was within a mile or two of the basketball court. His sweat glands must have had their own little GPS units. And there was absolutely no way he would ever keep his shirt on while playing. One time we were about to play a pickup game with a bunch of other dudes that we just met at the gym, and my friend got picked by the "Shirts" team. He made a big stink, and went ahead and took his shirt off any way. If there was a record book, the teams would have been listed as "Shirts + that sweaty guy who wouldn't wear a shirt" VS. "Skins".

I've never been much of a fan of sweaty guys, but I'm starting to think maybe I shouldn't have held them in such low regard. It seems that, in my advancing age, God has decided to teach me a lesson on the subject, because in the past couple of years, I have become one of those sweaty guys. Tonight I went out and mowed our yard, actually it was just half of the front yard, which took about 12 minutes, and I came inside afterwards so sweaty that I almost couldn't peel the shirt off my back. It was gross. And, it really wasn't that hot out, either. I think the temp was around 85, but in my defense it was quite humid. A couple of days ago at my softball game, when it was in the low 80s, I was sweating profusely while all the younger guys on my team were cool and collected. On one play I had to run from first all the way to home plate because the young guy batting behind me had the audacity to hit the ball all the way to the fence. The nerve of some young people! Well, I made it home safely, but I pretty much had to sponge myself off afterwards. I gotta remember to pack several extra towels in my bat bag next week!

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