What, you may ask, is this amazing plan that fell into my lap without my looking for it? I will tell you. All you need to do to lose weight is (drum roll, please)........register your 3-year-old daughter for preschool! (Ta-da!)
You are probably thinking to yourself, "Self, this Scott Hanson character is loony. What could putting his daughter in preschool have to do with his losing weight?"
|This is the "After" picture of me. You can tell this is really me because I have that exact tape measure sitting here on my desk.|
But, you see, the plus side is that, with all of the sickness that has invaded my body, I either am not able to keep whatever food I have eaten inside me, or I don't feel like eating anything to start with. So, the pounds have just been floating off! It's amazing!
I would recommend this diet plan to anyone. If you want to lose weight, simply send your kids off to school. If you don't have kids, borrow some from someone who does. If you're not married, get married, and try to start having kids of your own, if you know what I mean. In three years and nine months, you could be in the best shape of your life!
Who would have ever thought that signing the Girl up for preschool would make such a difference in my life? There's only one problem that I can see: next year, when the Boy goes to preschool too, there may be so many germs, and I may lose so much weight, that I will whither away. I better pack on the pounds this coming summer, just to be ready. Seems like a good idea to me.