Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Would You Like Some Salt With That?

I promise I will start writing about my crazy kids again real soon, but I have (at least) one more story about Grandma Millie that I thought needed to be told. If you hadn't heard, the Wife's Grandma Millie died 9 days ago at the age of 98 1/2. I think elderly people have the right to start going by half years again, much like children do, once they get above the age of 90. I know that's what I'm going to do, if I ever get to be that old. Might as well celebrate any milestone you can think of when you're that old, I always say.

So, any way, Grandma Millie was 98 1/2, and, like many older people, she loved salt. I think people's taste buds must start to whither away when they get older. Maybe our medical professionals should start trying to figure out how to keep taste buds alive longer, to go with the extended average life expectancy of people.

Whatever the case, Grandma Millie had been losing her taste buds for a while, which meant that she was always adding salt to whatever she ate. She usually didn't wait to taste her food before dumping a load of salt on it. I can vividly remember looking over at her plate while we were having dinner together as a family one time, and seeing a visible layer of salt on top of her pork chop. This was a pork chop that had been simmering in a vat of cream of mushroom soup for hours on end. And everyone knows that cream of anything soups are some of the saltiest foods on earth.

Grandma Millie didn't care. She wanted to get some semblance of taste out of her food, so on went the salt. And it didn't seem to be harming her. She did live to be 98 1/2, after all. Maybe the salt was acting as a kind of preservative, keeping all of her internal organs fresh and spry. Who knows...The one thing I do know is that her doctors told her to cut down on her salt intake a couple of months ago, and now she's gone. Seems a little fishy to me.
If I ever get to be 98 1/2 years old, I am going to want a salt lick next to my favorite chair. Can you make sure that happens, please? Thanks 
Well, one of the last really salty things she had was some delicious chicken from KFC. So, in honor of Grandma Millie, I went to KFC for lunch today. I didn't add any extra salt to anything, like she would have, but believe me, I got plenty of salt. And my organs feel nice and spry. I think maybe I'll reach 98 1/2 after all. Hopefully my taste buds will accompany me to that ripe, old age.


  1. You write about Grandma Millie all you want. What a lady! The way she talked to you just made you feel like she was telling you, "You're alright, kid." She made me feel so welcome and seemed to like it that she reminded me of my own grandmother (who only made it to 97 1/10), although judging from what other people have been saying this past week, I sure wasn't the only one.

  2. Well stated, Laura! She was truly an amazing lady!