Monday, February 24, 2014

How to Ruin Your Own Life - by an Expert in the Field

Scott
Sometimes I have really, really, really dumb ideas. That fact, in itself, wouldn't be so bad, except that I am very, very, very prone to acting on my really dumb ideas. I recently acted on one of my dumb ideas, and it's pretty much ruined my life forever.

Just thinking about what I did makes me so angry at myself I can hardly keep typing!

OK, I think I have settled down enough to continue, but I may have to take a break now and then. Please bear with me.

I've always been a pretty healthy kinda guy. Physically, at least. Mentally, maybe not so much, but, that's a topic for a different post. I have been to see a Doctor maybe 5 times in the past 15 years, and it's always been for very minor issues. The most pressing medical issues I've had recently have been a couple of bouts of clogged ears. And, if the Wife hadn't made me go get them cleaned out because I couldn't hear her talking to me, I probably wouldn't have gone then.

I'm not really sure what the impetus was, but I recently thought that it would be a good idea to find a doctor and go have a physical to verify that I truly am as healthy as I thought I was. Maybe it's because I want to be healthy as my kids are growing up...Maybe I've noticed that my tummy is not getting any smaller... Maybe it was because I needed something to do instead of all the back-breaking work on the renovation of our house... Who knows what the real reason is, but I did do some research and made an appointment at a nearby clinic.

Making an appointment for a physical wasn't the dumb thing, though. What was really dumb was when I called back to ask if they would do some blood work and check my cholesterol. Why did I think that was a good idea? Didn't I realize what my usual breakfasts, lunches, dinners and snacks are made up of? Did I really think there was going to be any other possible result other than a cholesterol level that was through the roof? Did I once think what that would mean for my daily breakfasts that include between 3 and 6 eggs that I love so dearly? Sometimes I am astounded by how dumb I can be...

So, yeah, my cholesterol level is high. Amazingly, it's really not all that high. Everyone seems to think I can lower it by eating a little better (in their minds that means fewer eggs, but we'll see...) and getting some exercise, for the rest of my life. Next time I get a dumb idea, please remind me to keep my mouth shut. I'm so angry right now...

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