Tuesday, May 26, 2015

The CK&C Guide to Guiding

Over the years I have played around with the idea of trying to be a part-time trout fishing guide. It would be fun to have a reason to go fishing more often, and for the most part I get along with almost all types of people, plus a little added income never hurt anyone. The idea has been percolating up in the recesses of my brain for a long time, but I've never pulled the trigger and actually started guiding, for two reasons.

The first reason is that one of the main duties of a fishing guide is to provide lunch for his clients. That means taking the time to slap together some sandwiches, putting some pops or waters in the cooler, and having some chips or other snacks at the ready. When it's just me going out, I just jump in the car and go, and worry about eating later. When hanging out at home, I am a grazer, eating all day long. But when I fish, I am there to fish, and I can go for hours, or even decades, without thinking of food. So, feeding my clients would be a huge drawback.

The second reason I've never started guiding is that there is a distinct possibility that a client could drown, and that would be a serious buzzkill. Even on seemingly quaint trout streams, where I would do most of my guiding, an uncoordinated novice fisherperson could easily step in the wrong spot and go tush-over-teakettle into moderately deep water. Have you looked at the average human these days? A lot of them are quite uncoordinated. I don't need that headache in my life.

So, I continue to not be a fishing guide. Except on rare occasions, when I take a friend or two out and show them the ropes when it comes to fly fishing. I have had the pleasure of taking my very coordinated friend Bryon out fly fishing a couple of times, and I am happy to say that he caught his first trout on a fly yesterday, along with several other trouts, a few suckers, and even a handful of sunfish. He even performed a beautiful LDR (Long Distance Release) on a brute of a brown trout that seemed to fly all over the pool before coming unattached to Bryon's fly. I witnessed that LDR from just a few feet away, and I am proud to announce that Bryon showed just the right amount of exasperation after the trout got off. No actual tears flowed, but I could tell that he was crying on the inside. Just like a seasoned fly fisherman!
The coordinated Bryon and his trout. He's so coordinated that he took this photo himself. Now that's coordinated! 

All this talk about guiding and trout and heartache reminds me that, although I am not a guide, I do fancy myself as a teacher of the sport, and I have an "Intro to Fly Fishing" class coming up in the near future through the city of Roseville, Minnesota's Community Education department. You can spend two nights learning more than you ever thought was possible to learn about fly fishing, and yet still just scratch the surface of this amazing sport. If you are interested, check out the Roseville website here. If you can't make it to the class, send me a note and maybe I will take you out on a guided trip. You'll have to pass a battery of tests first to prove how coordinated you are, but that shouldn't be difficult. Unless you are an average human...

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