Saturday, August 8, 2015

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The odds were stacked against him. He was outnumbered at least 50 to one. But he had cunning and guile. And he knew how to fight. He only attacked at night, when his enemy was least expecting it. And he had sharp, jagged implements of destruction that he knew how to use. As well as his secret weapon, peanut butter. One by one he picked off his enemies, until soon his kills numbered in the dozens. Despite his proficiency at taking out the enemy, he received no accolades, other than the occasional peck on the cheek or pat on the tush from his adoring wife. He especially liked the pats on his tush...

Soon our hero found himself on the cusp of a monumental event: his 50th kill. It had taken more than two years, but now it was within his grasp. His plan had to be even more cunning, his guile had to have guile of its own, because his 50th victim had proven to have guile as well. This enemy was a smart one, that's for sure. He seemed to be laughing at our hero's implements, and eating our hero's peanut butter without leaving a trace. But a hero never gives up. He gets more clever. He gets more determined. He gets more peanut butter...

Today he came upstairs from the dark, cavernous basement with the taste of victory on his lips. He had made his 50th kill, and he was darn happy about it. He boasted to his wife, who gave him an extended tush pat. He liked that. It made him excited to kill his 100th...

His 50th kill... I apologize if this kill photo is too graphic for you. I have gotten used to death, being the vicious killer that I am...

2 comments:

  1. victory = dead mouse
    Taste of victory on his lips = ???!
    I guess that explains why the wife chose a pat on the tush over a peck on the cheek.

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    Replies
    1. Yes, I agree, she is a very smart woman! That is what you were saying, correct?

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