Wednesday, August 12, 2015

The Truth About Global Warming

As you probably know if you are an avid reader of this blog, and who in their right mind wouldn't want to be, I love to tackle the controversial subjects. Over the years I've written about such timely and controversial subjects as: "Is it grosser that Jerry Lee Lewis married his cousin, or that she was 13?", and "Candy cigarettes - Malicious or Delicious?". Now I am going to tackle yet another doozy:
global warming.

I was not always a big believer in global warming. For one thing, everyone in the media thinks it's definitely true. That fact alone makes me suspicious. Have you listened to people in the media lately? They all seem insane. Secondly, it seemed to me that the scientists who were pro-global warming were making their claims based on a little over a hundred years' worth of weather data, but the Earth is a lot older than that. So, yeah, maybe it's warmer than it was a hundred years ago, but that's just a small blip in the overall age of the Earth. Perhaps it is more of a mirage than a trend...? It sure didn't seem any warmer than usual the past 5 winters in Minnesota, am I right?

But the last couple of summers have changed my mind. It seemed like things started to change right around the time I turned 40. Summer seemed hotter. Air conditioning felt nicer. I started to sweat buckets while doing the smallest bit of strenuous activity. Back in my 20s I could play game after game after game of basketball on the hottest day of the summer and just have a slight glistening afterward. Now that I am in my 40s, I am completely drenched if I shoot one three-pointer.

Along those same lines, I mowed the yard tonight, and my shirt was wet for hours afterwards. It was gross. The only reason I can think of for all this added sweat is global warming. What else could it be? So, if you were on the fence about global warming before, believe me, it's true. Just ask my sweaty t-shirt! I'm so glad I could clear up this big controversial subject for you. Next week I think I will tackle another controversy: Potty Training: Pull-Ups or Undies? You'll want to stay tuned for that one!

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